Still a dreamer…Old Memories and New Hopes

Archive for March, 2015

Some Lovely Quotes

“What people call serendipity sometimes is just having your eyes open”. Jose Manuel Barroso

“There will  always be serendipity involved in discovery”. Jeff Bezos

“Sometimes serendipity is just intention unmasked”. Elizabeth Berg

“With a library it is easier to hope for serendipity than to look for a precise answer.” Lemony Snicket

Serendipity…The occurrence and development of events by chance in a happy or beneficial way.

Who believes in serendipity?

Me!!!!!!! ………………………………………………………. “Serendipity always rewards the prepared.”  Katori Hall

Modern Day Dear John

When you have a relationship that is no longer working for you. When the best is behind you. When being nourished is a foreign term, it is time to end, even though email is not the best way, it is the quickest. Here is a sample of a modern-day dear John letter.

Dear Whoever,

This is not meant to be mean-spirited. I find that closure is necessary for me. I liked having you in my life. I love not having you in my life.

You never deserved my friendship. You were my worst mistake. I have no regrets. Lesson Learned.

I wish you whatever,

Smarter Now

You’re the one taking charge. Perhaps you were doing unrealistic magical thinking about changing him/her. Freedom is just an email away. Take away the power from the person and empower yourself, not repeating the same mistake again. Needless to say, physical or emotional abuse should never be tolerated. Not one shove or one mean vicious comment. The more you love yourself, the stronger you will become in dealing with negative relationships. A mantra that should stay with you. “Never settle for less than you are.” pm

This was originally published  on Bershan Shaw and URAWarrior…

Family Joys

Off to Salt Lake City Utah for a very happy occasion. My beautiful wonderful granddaughter is graduating high school and then on to new adventures for her. She leaves for Australia to volunteer with Aborigine children, and will travel throughout the country making her mark. She has so much to give. When she comes back after a month, we are all going to Calif. to celebrate my milestone birthday. Time…..really flies as one gets a bit older. Then a counselor at a children’s day camp until Aug…..and the biggest move forward? College. Her life is ahead of her. May her choices and experiences be positive, and may she celebrate the wonder-filled and talented young women she is. May she thrive in all of her adventures, and when she has her career, may she make an emotional dent in a positive way to all she touches. Congratulations my love and full steam ahead. I love you heart and soul forever, and proud as can be.

How The Elevator Became My Mood Elevator

Three of us enter the elevator in the lobby of my building. We have seen each other before, and have a New York kind of nodding and faint smiling relationship. I press 2 because I walk the  stairs to 4. They press 8. In a matter of seconds this was our encounter.

Woman in her 40’s looks at my Gucci handbag. “Vintage?” she asks. “Yes like me” I answered.

Her significant boyfriend. said “Well you both look great.”

Me smiling as I exit. “Thank you and enjoy your evening.”

Conclusion: I like being referred to as vintage, rather than senior, golden years, elderly, or just plain old. Vintage has an edge and can be quite valuable.

New Yorker’s unfriendly? Hardly……

Happy Happy Story

Recently read that Dame Judi Dench found love again. Ten years after her loved husband of 30 years died.  She met her new love, conservationist David Mills, 70 and quite good-looking. Judi Dench is 80 and beautiful.  They met “through animals.” Her partner runs a British Wildlife Center. They have no plans to live together, both leading busy and independent lives.

“But he is so lovely with a great sense of humor. Now it’s absolutely wonderful, because there’s somebody who makes me laugh.” Isn’t it lovely.”

Lovely indeed. A wonder-filled story that gives me joy for her. Now, I have a milestone birthday coming up, Age Appropriate(only)  younger  man sounds most appealing, I love animals, I would love to laugh again, more …I would not need to live with someone, I’m independent and  busy, and I  believe in Hope Springs Eternal…….but I’m  not a British  Dame and no chance of having that title bestowed upon me.  I think I could pass for a dame in this country, but that doesn’t count I guess. They met in my opinion, because they were meant to met, and they were in each others path. My dear friend Edith who just passed away at 97 always told me  ” never search for a man. If it’s meant to be it will happen” Well, it happened for Dame Judi Dench.

As my About section  on my blog states….”Old memories, New hopes. Hey, you never know!!!!!!!

Her wonderful spirit

IMG_2180[1]A new guardian angel was just released into the Universe.

I miss you Dear Edith and thinking of you lovingly on your birthday…

mother nature is a man and other observations..

I have a friend Edith, who is 96, with wisdom pouring out of her pores. She has a favorite saying, and I quote “You take yourself wherever you go.” I visit her at a senior residence. She has never complained in the nine years that I know her. Everyone fortunate enough to be in her path, loves her. “This is my family” she tells me, because she has none. She wanted children, but she wasn’t able to have them. She graduated college when few women did. She married and divorced quickly. “He was a mama’s boy” she told me. She was an only child and welcomed back with open arms after her divorce. She became a dance instructor at Arthur Murray Dance Studio. Dogs became an integral part of her life, especially Bichon Frises, and she even became a judge for the breed. Her room is adorned with large photographs…

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Doing OK…Most of The Time…My Way

Another snow storm. Another cancellation. Had tickets with my friend to see Constellations. Dinner first at Joe Allen’s…Same story last month. Same show, same snow. Now we will enjoy the show  next week. Too dangerous to go out because of the freeze and ice. Spent yesterday at MOMA experiencing and enjoying the Bjork show. So many thousands of women live alone in NYC, and we are all faced with the same problem. If not working full-time, how do you fill your time. I did community service for over 50 years in New Jersey. The police department in NYC doesn’t have a walk in for domestic violence victims that a crisis team handles. It is handled by police people. I tried to volunteer in many places, but either too far to travel for what I wanted to do, or hospital service, and I didn’t want to work in a hospital. The first year after my husband died, my service was to me, to figure out how and if I wanted to live again. I couldn’t do what I wanted to, because of my children and grandchildren. Not exactly a positive legacy to leave. I re-created myself, and I must say not only am I proud, but I know my husband would be beaming.

So a lazy day at home. Productive since I don’t stay in bed or cry all day at a pity party. I do believe in pity parties, but just can’t stay too long. Five minutes and leave. I wonder what all the lonely women do in their apartments all day and night. Some are lonely. I try not to use that word. It makes me feel lonely. I’m alone but  take in all the creative energy of the city. Forever grateful for treasured family and friends.  Fortunate to be able to go  to concerts, jazz, movies, theater, museums, etc. Have friends who are more than willing to enjoy the benefits of living in the city.  Cooking and baking are foreign  terms used in my former life, before I ran away from New Jersey. My new theory is…”if someone can make it better, let them.” I cook oatmeal, veggies, and occasionally cold water wild fish. A can of sardines is sometimes a healthy alternative. As long as I have nuts, hummus,, salad and fruit, I’m set.  But, I’m talking about a long snowy day. Since I write a great deal, reading books has  become part of my past life. When my husband died, my concentration went  as far as People Magazine. I do read the New York Times. I find depressing news way too depressing to read. Most of the news is frustrating as well.  I feel I was sent to the wrong planet. A place sadly, where violence and hatred seem to  thrive. My planet is one of peace, love and kindness. Maybe Avatar?  I enjoy Twitter and have many connections in The Lovely Land of Twitter.  Facebook and write for three blogs. But my pain is  there and will never go away.   Sometimes it becomes overwhelming and I know  what to do. My husband and I danced at least once a week alone in our home. Always to Louis Armstrong, or jitterbug to his  favorite big bands ,the sounds of Glenn Miller, Tommy Dorsey, Benny Goodman, and my favorites Rod Stewart and Charles Aznavour.   Not  looking for self-torture, so I rarely play  anymore…….On this very snowy dreary day, just didn’t feel like  going  to the gym. Instead I put  on Pure Disco…..set the timer for 25 minutes and danced with pure joy, no inhibitions making the moves even more aerobic, and smiling all the time, in my own fantasy land with magical thinking on the side.

So what I did  on yet another snowy day?  Not drink the pain away, not eat the pain away, and not drug the pain away. I danced the pain away……and as I always think, I’m OK.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Integrity..”the quality of being honest and having strong moral principles.

Genuine..”truly what something is said to be; authentic

Two of my favorite words for people, places, and things. I try to surround myself with those that have these qualities. As Rumi so beautifully said..”Be with those who help your being.”