Still a dreamer…Old Memories and New Hopes

To be a good friend? Not always at your convenience. Be there when needed at their convenience. Be there when they’re together. Be there when they’ve fallen apart. Be there when you can tell just by the sound of their voice, the tears are being held back. Be part of the emotional glue helping to put them together. Laugh with friends and cry with friends. Exalt in the sun together and dance in the rain holding their hands. Cry with friends. If needed, gently suggest therapy . You’re a friend, not trained to deal with very serious issues that may need medication. and professional help. Self therapy may come later  when they get stronger and they are able to utilize emotional tools that will be given them in times of severe stress.

And always be there. Not leading, not pushing, but walking side by side, by their side.

A dear friend……..Priceless

Comments on: "Friendship…….To Just Be There……." (7)

  1. Katherine M said:

    Very good advice.

  2. I always try to be this kind of friend. I don’t have too many I can count on to be this for me, but there are many who can count on me. 🙂

    • My feeling is that you are this kind of friend. Wish it could be nourishing on both sides. At this age and stage in my life, I have weeded out many who are negative or not nourishing and left with beautiful flowers in my Garden of Friendship. Wish that for you Courtney. When my husband died, I knew who my true loving friends were and are still there for me. Physical house cleaning and emotionally cleaning has to be done every so often. I always appreciate hearing from you and send you heartfelt thanks. Paulette

      • Thanks Paulette, I’m glad my authenticity shows through my words.
        I agree… I too have sifted through and unfortunately I had to weed out a few people who had a tendency to not only be negative but would suck the life out of a room by just being present. I have done my best to steer clear of those types of folks for several years but sometimes you are in situations when it can not be avoided. I always feel drained after one of those encounters. Fortunately they do not happen too often and I avoid them like the plague when I can.
        I have 2 friends I know that I know are there for me no matter what. They love me warts and all.. so to speak. I am blessed to have several people I can count on for what I call “friend fuel” but it isn’t the same as trusting 100% with all your secrets without fear of judgment and ridicule. That is when the scope narrows significantly and I don’t allow others into my “inner sanctum” as one friend put it.
        My husband and I also have 4 couples we truly enjoy spending time with where we give and receive “friend fuel”. We all feel better, refreshed, stronger and satiated after spending time together. I look for, find and cultivate those relationships.
        I get great satisfaction from being trusted by others and it feels good knowing I have a beautiful Garden of Friendship and that I am also a flower in someone else’s garden as well. 🙂

      • Hi Courtney,
        Loved your note. For sure your authenticity shines through.I too stay clear of the ones that sap all your good energy. Once out, they are weeded, like toxic plants. The best friends are the ones who “get you” and no judgments or explanations are ever necessary. I am fortunate to have friends for so many years that there is mutual love and respect and also new ones. To talk about the most personal feelings and have 100% trust, I have three and that is pretty good. Since I have joined the club I dreaded to join, being a widow for almost 11 years, I call my family and dear friends my emotional transfusions and did write about My Friendship Garden. Found when the weeds were taken out, made room for new and thriving flowers. Love your expression “friend fuel”. If I ever use it, I will give you credit. I do know intuitively that if you lived here, we would be friends. We seem to be from the same planet. I appreciate our connection and thank you always for your continued support. A beautiful flower in my “friendship garden.”

      • What a sweet compliment. I too believe we would be friends! I think we are on the same page with so many of our thoughts and life ambitions. 😉

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