I have been trying to write a blog about an experience I had with a few of my women friends. I do not want to appear harshly judgmental, but at the same time, I only have my observation. It has taken me months to process the experience.
I need to preface by saying I love to dance. My husband and I danced all the time. If a mood evoking song came on during a show we were watching, a quick spin around the den was enjoyed, with Rod Stewart. I play disco in my apartment, and dance alone for the healthy aerobic exercise and good free feeling it gives me.
I’m also extremely sensitive to any environment I’m in, and seem to pick up energy, both positive and negative. That being said, my friends and I decided to do a “why not?” experience. For the fun of it try a dancing night event. There are those times that the “why not’s” become “what was I thinking?”
Well, for some reason…..fun was not exactly on my dance card. I did dance with and without my friends. I sort of danced with a man swaying to Chuck Berry. He held my hand stretched out and we moved to the music, far apart. The music was loud and louder. The group of men and women were regulars and knew each other. A bit like a dancing club. The music all from the 50’s and several in outfits to match the time warp. I thought I would pick up the feeling that people were having a great time moving to the sounds of Johnnie Ray, Elvis Jailhouse Rock, The Platters, and many other Rock and Roll Legends. It just didn’t feel that way at all. It seemed very sad and lonely to me, even though I didn’t personally feel sad and lonely. I was there to definitely move.
People connected to the music and the desire to dance, but totally disconnected from each other. A argument took place when one of the women in her 50’s costume had a fight with a guy, in his 2015 jeans ensemble, because he started to dance with another woman and ignored her. She was furious and left the club.
Two hours and two drinks each later, our foursome departed. Perhaps my feelings projected unfairly.
With an empty feeling I went back to my apartment and spent some time with John Coltrane and Miles Davis. My dancing was over for the night.
Memories of dancing with Barry forever etched in my mind and body.
Comments on: "Dance With Me?" (8)
Sad to hear that in our Age someone could not share anything not even a Man she sure would not say no if some other Man came up to her and ask her to Dance. what can you do.
I wish I had the Nerve to go just out of the House, I’m happy for you,at least you get out of the House.
Maybe next time will be better. Will talk soon.
Marianne.
Thanks Marianne for your comment. There won’t be a next time. Live and learn.
When dance isn’t just dance but memories,associations,even expectations, a venue that offers “dancing” can be a disappointment. I had no expectations. Didn’t even particularly want to go…but the low lights, the beat of the music could not be denied and I just wanted to move.
As you might say….it was what it was or wasn’t,
For me, I need more than low lights and the beat of the music. Glad it worked for you. I always appreciate your comments. Wish I wasn’t so tuned in to the energy surrounding me., Not sorry we went at all, just would never go again.
Oh my…. I’m sorry this happened. Like you, I pick up on energy and “vibes” people give off and I can see right through masks. It is sad when you can’t go somewhere to enjoy some fun because people are not there for that reason. It probably (speculating here) seemed like a good place to “hookup” with someone. People are so desperate to connect these days, they are “looking for love in all the wrong places” if you will.
That is why social media has exploded. Folks are lulled into a false sense of connection when it isn’t real. Then when they are out in the real world with flesh and blood, they have no clue how to interact.
I try to make and cultivate true friendships and I avoid Facebook. I have a twitter account that I tweet to once in a while and my blog interfaces on there so my friends can read it who do not follow me on WordPress, but I am so glad I have real people in my life. And I am glad I can find others like myself who see things as they really are.. 🙂
I am so grateful Courtney to have the nourishment of loving friends and family. When I go out of my comfort zone to try something new, sometimes it works and this time it didn’t. The exact feeling you conveyed is how I felt. We pick up on the energy and vibes and what I saw and felt were robots trying to have a good time, but not connecting at all, except by themselves, Dancing can be joyous, but this was not. Another friend of mine who went felt the same and thought people were faking emotions….but who knows and who am I to judge. I just observe from my POV. Live and learn and would never go again to a “dance club.” One positive? It was aerobic for sure. and didn’t stay too long. I always look forward to your words.
Good column…like how it acknowledges feelings not completelyy understood. Can picture the scene perfectly….
Sent from my iPad
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Always appreciate your input. I know if you were with me, we would have looked at each other and felt only the rythmn of sadness. Theirs….