I wonder how many can relate to my experiences. I wrote a post called Friendship Garden many years ago. It was basically about letting go of some toxic plants to make room for new and nourishing flowers. The same way we do physical cleaning, we also need to do emotional housecleaning. When my husband died over 13 years ago, I let go of many people. Not in an aggressive way, because it’s not my style to be confrontational. I like a mellow zen type existence. I do have expectations. I treat others with respect and kindness and like that in return, without judgements. I like to say “I let go of people” rather than “getting rid of.” It sounds softer, but the results are the same. You don’t have to be with negative people, you don’t have to be with people who definitely “don’t get you.” You have choices and the more empowered you are, the more choices you have. Just because you know someone for ten, twenty, thirty, forty, or over fifty years is not the reason they are in your life, or rather, they have to stay in your life. Friends are in your life at different times for different reasons. It’s not a given you have to keep them. I was fortunate that it was my decision to let go.
Something wonderful happened to me. For ever friend I let go of, there were new and nourishing friends that were in my life by choice, not because of the amount of time they were there before. I have a Friendship Garden that is beautiful and colorful and so grateful for every new flower, and for all my forever friends.
“Care about what other people think and you will always be their prisoners.” Tzo