mother nature is a man and other observations..

Frustration! Not So Terrible

When I lived in New Jersey a lifetime ago, I always assumed my washing machine and dryer would live forever. We had Maytag and that was their reputation. So while I didn’t take humans for granted, I did take my washing machine and dryer very much for granted. As a matter of fact, they are what I miss most in New Jersey….except for a rare few people I love from my other life with my wonderful husband. When occasionally my machines stopped performing, I would call a service person and like magic they were fixed. Now I live in an apartment in New York City, and machines are in laundry room and not my responsibility.
So what is my responsibility…….. is me, and the machines that have to keep working? My phone and my computer.
The last two days I have been on the phone trying to get information re Medicare and Aarp. My iPhone and computer. Yesterday I was only on the phone for five hours and got very little info that I needed. Voila, they told me to call Social Security which I did, and was told the wait would be over one hour. Just to myself I said f this and hung up. I literally was on the phone for five hours with no satisfaction. I also gave name and date of birth about thirty times.
Today was a different issue. No internet connection on phone or computer. I immediately called my provider which happens to be Spectrum, hoping it was a location issue. That’s easy since its their problem and would be repaired or whatever it requires to fix and all will be fine. But alas it was with my modem and router. I should be embarrassed to say I didn’t know one from the other. Actually, I don’t know the difference or I didn’t until today. I was on the phone with Apple and Spectrum for several hours but with a huge difference. I owe huge gratitude to Ally at Apple. She was knowledgeable and extremely patient. She even called me back when we were disconnected. She also realized it wasn’t an Apple problem, but with my modem and router. So I called my provider and to my surprise, got someone immediately willing and able to help. I also had a quick lesson in those two mysterious boxes. Very easy now to know the difference. Don’t know if you can relate, but when it comes to wires and taking them in and out, and unplugging devices, I get very nervous and think everything is going to just disconnect and will have to wait a week to find out what I did wrong. Oh, didn’t want to forget that Ally said if I have a problem to please call her and she gave me her contact information. A miracle in my opinion. Now I’m beginning to feel like a tech genius plugging wires in and out and nothing is blowing up. Spectrum advisor was very helpful and extremely patient. Issue solved. She asked if I would take part in a survey and the end of the call. I know it sounds so easy…..five simple questions and you do on your phone..1-10 is your choice to answer. 1 not satisfied to 10 totally satisfied. Here’s the tricky part…they tell you how to do 10. I have no clue and end up giving a 9. At the end of survey you can leave message and I have left the same message several times over the last few months. “I meant to answer 10 on all questions, but not sure how to put in so leave 9. As you can see the tech part of my life is not where my strengths are strongest.
So today not as frustrating… When I think of what’s going on in this county and the rest of the world, I realize spending hours on the phone is pretty easy compared to trading places with anyone else. I have a friend who is helping in a country across the world where people are starving and being murdered. Over the years, gratitude has taken over any real complaining. It’s part of the mindfulness experience of how to live….if you’re fortunate to have the choice.

New York City

I am so proud of the city I live in. We are diversified and kind to one another. I did like that our mayor said he will protect the citizens against what seems to be a terrifying alternative.

The March January 21 2017

I’m very vocal about politics with close friends and on Facebook…..Not so much on my blog although I am reflective and emotional and always from my truth. I just don’t want to be political, because I would get all tangled up in my emotions, especially at this time in this country.
But wanted to do a post about a time in history that I felt a part of. The Women’s March in NYC. I marched or walked rather slowly for over 5 hours with close friends, women, men, children. Solidarity, Unity, Love, Peace, and Action Oriented people. All feeling the same emotions. Not “alternative facts” but the truth. There were over 300,000 in NYC and I felt proud and empowered to be a part of history.
This is just the beginning of The Resistance Movement.

Hibernate

Winter has begun, but only one little snow storm…..but plenty of cold, dreary, windy days. In the city I live and love, there are few trees to shield the wind. I don’t weigh very much and feel I need to hold on to street poles not to be blown away. I live near the river so it’s especially windy. I think that bears instinctively know what’s best. For the winter, just hibernate. Hang in and stay cozy. But I’m not a bear and since they don’t get bored, I mean I don’t know for sure, but I know for sure, I would get a bit sad if I had to stay inside. So I layer and layer and layer and go out. It actually takes about 15 extra minutes putting on layers and the top layers as well. Coat, gloves, hat, and boots. Nanook of the North is what I resemble when I go out. Top that with sunglasses for glare, and I could be out trick or treating as Mother Winter. I also go to one of my favorite quotes and hope you can use as well, when it’s a blizzard out there… “In the depth of winter I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer.” Albert Camus

January Joys

Throwing out that last page in December was a welcome moment. Not that it was a terrible year, but politics which I rarely write about on my blog was disturbing. A New Year for me always brings some new hopes and dreams to be realized once again. Some are easier than others.
I just finished an article in The New York Times, Style Section…. Modern Love about a cuddling group. It is of course true, that we all need human touch and contact, and when missing or lacking can be serious to your well-being. The writer said her blood pressure peaked because she lacked touch. Now I’m certainly not judging anyone who feels the need to join a group to cuddle with strangers. What ever works for you that you feel is beneficial to your sense of self is not something I would judge. I’m talking about myself. That would probably be the last thing I would do..I never go to singles groups either because anything that I would find demoralizing is off-limits. Going on-line dating sites is easier, and I go on and vow never to go on again until I go on again…..always thinking maybe this time. Sadly the one guy I met is totally limited emotionally, and I know red flags when I see them flapping away. It’s great when you reach a certain age and wisdom seeps in and takes over emotions. Mistakes become lessons.
So back to cuddling. You go in a home where there are mattresses on the floor and you take your place and select a partner to cuddle with for 15 minutes, and then switch partners. If a couple sees an unattached woman, they will ask her to join their coupling session. There is no alcohol and no sex. It’s all about just the human touch. At first I smiled reading this article, but then I became very sad to think how tragic it is for so many singles to have to cuddle with a stranger. Perhaps that’s why there are so many pets in NYC… Last year I suggested to my dear friend to have a stuffed adorable animal to chat with or “cuddle.” I have a collection and of course I give them all personalities. If a few fall off their pillow, I apologize and gently put them back. As I child it was natural for me to give personalities to inanimate objects. So how could I read and think it’s rather strange to go to a group of strangers for comfort of an intimate nature. By the way my friend loves her stuffed doggie and has given him a name and personality. Living alone and fighting the word lonely or loneliness is a full-time job. Somewhat easier for me since I have a full-time therapist 24/7….Me ..Anything positive is a positive.
This brings me to the term self-love. The New York Post Interview will cover this topic, I hope most of what I do and feel about self-love will make the edit and be on the video. Enough on the subject for now.
I hope the New Year brings new beginnings for all who are working on projects and new endings for things or people who shouldn’t be in your life in the first place. Self love gives you the confidence to know the difference.
Wishing Laughter, Love, Peace, and Safe Lives to all.

2016 Ending In Exciting News and Hoping 2017 Will Be Even More!!!

…………So I had some interesting experiences during the last several months.
No, not on any dating sites. I would categorize those as somewhat depressing, and would never go on another. Only Stitch.net. More of a community than a dating site. I love doing events for them. Many at the Comic Strip in NYC. We all like to laugh, and sharing laughter is healthy, especially with this last election experience.
………..So when I was asked by Marcie at Stitch, to do two interviews, I was delighted to have the opportunity to talk about Stitch and also for me. To talk about being a single woman in NYC and proud to be Vintage, I jumped at the opportunity. There are very few voices talking about All subjects over a certain age.
The first video was for Global News Brazil. The producer called me and we immediately connected over the phone. We actually met at the shoot in my apartment. She asked me to select two other members who would be willing to share their thoughts. I immediately thought of Michelle and Ni. Two fantastic involved and evolved women, about 20 years younger than I am. We were three loving friends filmed chatting together…Talking about the aspects of being single in New York, or as I relate “No Sex In The City.” Quite different from the original concept.
I have been waiting to see the finished product. It has already aired in Brazil. Their regulations will not allow the link to be shown here. Have no clue why. The producer is sending me a CD and I’ll be able to see with Michelle and Ni. I did receive a wonderful email from Andrew at Stitch. I quote….”Thanks so much Paulette. You’ll be happy to know that the Brazilian interview has literally brought in hundreds of new members (plus a number of requests to translate Stitch into Portuguese.) So whatever you said must have been very convincing.” After smiling and feeling fantastic, I immediately sent off an email to tell Andrew, we were three women talking about Stitch etc etc and they also deserve the credit. I read the mail to both, and we’re waiting to see the video together.
Then a producer from the New York Post got in touch after Marcie told me she would call to talk about another interview. This one, a bit more about intimacy after 70. Would I be interested and comfortable? I would love to find another great love in my life. I would also not settle for less than having three essential components. Chemistry, Attraction, and Passion. Not exactly what women over a certain age “should feel and discuss?”….So once again, I wanted to be a voice and possibly an inspiration to women who might relate to my words. I’ll pass on meeting a companion, unless a fabulous gay guy, any age, wants to be my friend.
The senior producer called me from her production company. We also connected on the phone and then we met in my apartment for the shoot. It would not be a formal interview at all. Interacting as if the cameras weren’t there, and in my apartment for over 7 hours,then at Babeland on Mercer Street, for another 4 hours. All for a 1-3 minute segment for a video. This one will have a link and hopefully I will be proud to share. I called the producer at least 4 times because I was specific and definite that I didn’t want to be sensationalized. Dignity and integrity are very important to me, as is being genuine. I was assured and reassured that their work speaks for itself. True, all their videos were done with impeccable style …..So not only was I on board, but my good friend Ronni also agreed immediately to share her thoughts and life style as well. We are polar opposites in many ways, but loving and respecting each other without any judgements.
Ronni is a free spirit. She has a joyful energy and rejoices in her many new experiences. I might add she’s always smiling.
I hope to be able to share this link soon. I will let it speak for itself.
“Try to be a rainbow in someone’s cloud.” Maya Angelou

Wishing everyone reading this A New Year, 2017, filled with Good Health, Happiness, Joy, and to always be Safe.

Kindness Works

I have always believed that kindness is contagious. Certain acts of kindness are so easy to do. A smile to a stranger who looks sad can sometimes bring great results.
Something that takes no time is praise. People always seem eager to complain, but when service is excellent, there is more you can do than just say thank you. Even in my twenties I remember shopping in the local department store and when a salesperson went out of their way, I would always ask who their manager was so I could give a compliment. I have continued to do this whether in a store, restaurant, phone help or any service given to me. Why not? It’s just a step further than thank you. I usually say the same thing…the person is a great asset and made my experience lovely.
So last year, after shopping many times in a neighborhood store called Rainbow Shop, Vicki seemed to be there all the times that I was there….. going out of her way to show me where things were, handing me coupons when they were offered and her personality lite up the store. This is a large shop with items of every conceivable need. Household items, hardware, keys made, nutrition bars, candy, gum, and stationery and greeting cards. There is very little that they don’t have available. Everyone in the store is eager to please. It seemed though that when I was there, so was Vicky. So one day I had to ask her who her manager was so I could tell them what an asset she was to the store.
Vicky smiled and said she was the owner. I was not surprised.
I smiled back and we hugged and I told her to give herself a raise.

It’s Just Not Possible/ Or Is It???

This is the third part of the trilogy of my truth. First was Allegory/Alleglory..Second was Short Sad Story and now this.
It’s not possible for me to meet someone on Tinder..(no longer on).. that I would want to see twice. It’s not possible he would be so educated, so sophisticated, so traveled, so appealing, and so selfless.
It’s just not possible that after 12 years. But, it was, and I did, and we met…….once.
Why wasn’t it possible for him to be age appropriate? Why wasn’t it possible for him to be in one place for longer than two months. Why wasn’t it possible to meet again and see what was possible. So, it became impossible, and then it was over. I was relieved because it was not meant to be.
And then he appeared again. And maybe the impossible could become———————————————–
And then again, maybe not.
“Feel my words.” I said.
He said he did.
It’s our choice..It’s our experience..It’s our lesson. It’s our possibility.

Thanksgiving and Politics Not A Great Combination

I try to stay apolitical on my blog, because I know so little about politics and politicians, and what I do know, I have little trust
I’m fortunate to be invited with my family to a wonderful holiday dinner….terrific friends and food and look forward every year to this delightful occasion. So much to be thankful and grateful for, and that is reinforced every year.
Very simply, I just want to use this venue to wish all who celebrate a joyous Happy Thanksgiving, and I will give special thanks if politics isn’t discussed in any way at the celebration I’m attending. I’m almost sure we all voted the same, but still would love the occasion to be a gentle one.