Still a dreamer…Old Memories and New Hopes

Archive for April, 2013

Experience with a psychic

Years ago I went to an astrologer in New York and she was very accurate.She and several others all told me I was a very old soul and at the time, so many years ago, I wasn’t fully aware of what that meant, Having always been curious about the mysteries of the unexplained,  I decided to go to a well known psychic in New York. He is so booked , he asked me not to put his name on my post. I will  respect his wishes.  He prefers that you not talk, but just listen and look at what he has written down.  He was spot on with his observations.  I was excited and full of awe about his predictions, but  shall have to wait and see. I would have liked to have seen him again soon, but he doesn’t encourage anyone coming back for at least two years. I have to say, he was “the real thing.”


Being soft in a hard world is hard.

Once upon a time

there stood with integrity, a little red house. It started out as a carriage house for horse and carriages that belonged to the people who lived in the big mansion. The mansion was torn down and a Frank Lloyd Wright home was built in its place, but the little carriage house was spared and for sale. It was surrounded by very large homes and if given a personality, would have been different, but proud nevertheless, waiting for someone to move in…humans preferred over horses this time. A couple with two small sons, not only saw the charm in the old house, but the price was right. A few minor changes were made and the family moved in. Soon the scent of fresh baked cookies, apples and cinnamon, sounds of laughter and joy filled the little house. There was a dutch door leading from the kitchen to the little porch, and neighbors always stopped by exalting in the essence the little house had. Holidays were celebrated as well as all occasions, with exhilaration, and the little house thrived as did the owners. The other homes were huge compared to the little red house, but none shone as brightly during the holiday season as the former home to horses and carriages did. A house that was filled with memories of family joys. The boys grew up and the house grew too little for the family. Time to make a decision. The little red house was going to be torn down and a new contemporary home would be built in its place.
A very difficult decision to make, but the land value had to be taken into consideration.

The day before my home was torn down, I went inside by myself and silence surrounded me. Empty of things, but not memories. Since I was a child, I have always given personalities to inanimate objects, and my home was no exception. It was so quiet, and yet the sounds and scents of the years spent were so embedded in my memory. I felt that I had to do something to mark this sad, but at the same time exciting time, since a new home would be soon on the site. I took out a pad and pencil and wrote a note to the little red house apologizing for the tear down, but with sincere thanks and love for the wonderful years, and in reality, it became the foundation for our new home. I try not to dwell too long in the past, but there are times I long for the little red house, my husband, and the two little boys who are now loving husbands and fathers.


Russian Proverb…

Longing for the past, is like chasing after the wind.

A bit off color observation/recollection

“They” say, (whoever they are) that a penis has no brain. That may be true, but hopefully some are attached to a heart and soul…

How Many Opinions????

    How many opinions do you really need, when making a personal decision?. Now, we’re not talking about medical, legal, or all that require expert advice. Just the simple every day decisions that can easily be made by one person…YOU…. or you can turn   into a full blown anxiety attack. I do know women who go shopping to buy something quite simple, like a pair of sunglasses, but it turns into a huge project, spending hours mulling whether they really need  them, and  what store, department or optical should they go to.  Then after asking several sales people what they think, finally  taking them  home for a few more opinions. I was then asked for my opinion about the color and size of the sunglasses. I gave my honest opinion, rather quickly…Yes, they look lovely on you, always mindful that is the way you compliment….and 3 days later, I hear about the return. Seems someone, somewhere, in her apartment building didn’t like them. I’m a firm believer that if you ask 10 opinions, you may very well get 10 opinions. Going shopping in my closet, even for sunglasses, makes life easier and certainly less expensive.

          Now, when it comes to my personal life, decisions are a bit more difficult to make. I still ask myself first before embarking on the journey of who to ask. Who would really  know better than me, and why ask is generally the conclusion I arrive at.

 Faced with a  major personal decison, like should I really be with a man who happens to be  younger, alot younger..really younger,  but thankfully legally younger… What would society think? Would it depend on what part of the country I lived in? Would the friendship work in Kansas?  I wonder about Texas, or heaven forbid Utah!!!  Better stay in New York City, certain parts of California would be ok, but not Orange County, and of course Oregon.,   Getting older is such  a relief.. You worry less about the opinions of others. You base your opinions  on your own experiences, and your common sense, that hopefully ripened  after 65.  You go for it, if you want to go for it. Maybe!  You do what you want, when you want, regardless of the opinions of others..The big BUT….I have never and would never intentionally hurt anyone. So perhaps, I should just stop counting!  So what’s your opinion?

More favorite quotes…

“There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle, and the other is as though everything is a miracle.”……………………Albert Einstein

A woman could be gorgeous at 20, charming at 40, and irrestible for the rest of her life.”……………………..Coco Chanel

Favorite Quotes Part 2

“Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication”……………Leonardo Da Vinci

“Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and die with their song still inside them”……. Thoreau

“Those who are strong when standing alone possess true courage”……..Friedrich Von Shiller

“The road to excess, leads not to the palace of wisdom, but to the basement of discontent……William Blake

I don’t know who to credit for the following , but when I read, validation of my feelings resonated loud and clear.
Acting out of self interest is not a dominant or selfish force,, but a survior tool used to protect oneself…………. sensitivity to the feelings of others. still an integral part of your life.

Friends and Family

I have been fortunate to have the best family and friends, their support and love have been my emotional transfusions. Now new friends and family….at Bloomingdales. I am a shopaholic, but only in my closet, where I refuse to let go of the things I used to wear in my other life, married and living in New Jersey. Why I decided to buy a few new pots and pans is such a mystery, that I have yet to unwrap them, and it’s been a week. Buy hey 20% off of something I don’t really need, is so much better than full price. I rarely cook and recently read stainless steel is much healthier to use, my excuse for the new fry pan and two pots. I never spent so much time buying things I didn’t need as I did for my new cookware. My old fry pan and pots did look a little worn, under a microscope, but they were old, and was that a chip I saw on the edge?? After lessons on how to take care of stainlees steel, I re thought the non stick and was reassured new non stick has no deadly chemicals seeping out to kill me. So finally decided on Italian cookware that comes with a lifetime warranty valid for USA and Canada only. So fortunate I live in the USA and must tell my children and grandchildren they have this warranty as my legacy to them. I must go food shopping and try out my new cookware, or maybe I’ll return and forfeit my friends and family, but just the Bloomie ones.

Evasive, but Necessary for now!

There are times in life, when emotional opportunities present themselves. Not looking for them, but nevertheless, they are gifts from the universe….of course, you have to believe in the meant to be’s. as they become life lessons for all involved..I for one do, very strongly. I have a dear friend who is 95 and I visit her often, for her wisdom. She too, is very spiritual and lectures me to live life free of the judgement of others, and Edith’s favorite saying is “you take yourself wherever you go.” I think I have done that my entire life, and it does take a tremendous amount of emotional hard work. I try to live by the principles in my Buddhist practice, being kind to yourself and others. I will be posting an essay soon, on perhaps what could be a trend in giving women more choices in their personal life. I sincerely hope so…and in a recent amazing Oscar winning documentary, Searching for Sugarman, the prophetic music of Sixto Rodriquez, featured the haunting lyric “the sweetest kiss I ever got, was the one I never tasted.”